Nat to Josh's Birthday BarBQ Sat / Fri / Thursday

Saturday

Today was EPIC, brilliant and utterly awesome in nearly every way. You may be thinking to yourself why is this, what made this day so great, well if you SHUT UP and listen I will tell you. It started off with me getting up at around nine O'Clock and although this does not sound so great but what made it great was going on the Xbox straight away. Later that day at six O'Clock I went to Jacob's house to celebrate Joshes birthday with a barbecue (and boy do I love barbecues). What happened at this barbecue? Lots of cool things: millions of gangster things plus epic things and funny things too. 

It started of with me putting one Xbox controller in my bag along with my water gun and one spare mag. Next I cycled up to Jacob's and played an old GameCube game at lest I think it was for the GameCube it might just have been a Wii game or some other shize. I only played two games of it as it was a tournament and I was terrible at the game and everyone else was very good at it and so I gust went outside and soaked some people with my water gun which was fun in fact soaking any one with a water gun is great family fun for every one not like High School Musical or bratz or even Hannah (the hated) Montana don't those names send a shiver down your spine because they do to me and as in the honored word of family guy damn nature your scary ramen to that (if you don't know what those are there noodles American noodles). After that we went inside and played on Modern Warfare two an OK game but it was great at Jacob's because we insulted Americans and one of the Americans called Jacob a RETARD can you believe it because I can not in fact it was a disgrace a total disgrace I demand a war MU HA HA HA and if you are taking me seriously or think I am being serious go and have a brain put in your head because I'm not a terrorist or a jihadist or an American and I'm not going to blow up robin hood airport or eat a turtle or send a twitter about it so go suck eggs you terrorist init and that's four hundred words right there. Soon after that little incident we had burgers yum yum yum burgers they were so bugery and meaty and tasty and cheesy because of the cheese and it had HP sauce on delicious. Soon after that I had another burger and then we had a Nerf and water fight speaking of Nerf there have been some new guns confirmed!!!  

 The Rev 5        

             
 Soon after we went on the trampoline and I soaked even more people with you guest it my water gun well what else would I use a banana or a random dude called Bob. 

Lazy Day - Jacob Here, BarBQ...Kinda, MoFO, Ripping Up The Allotment

We didn't really do very much today. Jacob was round and he and Nat spent loads of time upstairs on the X-Box before actually coming out into the Sun to shoot each other, and everyone else, with their water guns. Deb bought a "one-off" BarBQ from ASDA and we had beef burgers, turkey burgers, lamb thingamajigs on sticks; I made two veggie kebabs from onion, pepper, mushrooms and tomatoes for me and Deb. The little BarBQ was quite effective; the turkey burgers, however, were far too thick and so the outsides got incinerated whilst the centres remained uncooked. We solved this problem by cross slicing each burger and making two thin burgers. After we'd done this the turkey burgers were rather nice. The kebabs were a bit hit and miss and next time I'll give more thought to the size of the individual items. Shantelle had gone to York, for the day(!), to see relatives so Han played pestered Nat and Jacob instead.
At one point the kids were stupid enough to mess with Deb:

BE AFRAID 

BE VERY VERY AFRAID

Don't Mess With This Mother 

OR 

Your Arse Will Be Grass!!!

Later that evening, when it was cool enough, Deb and I went to the allotment to water our "small" area of planting. While we were there we had a look at the covered areas where weeds had grown on top. These,in the main, had rooted into the lumps of earth I'd thrown there and were easy to rip off the covering. We had a deeply satisfiying ten minutes doing just this and afterwards the allotment didn't look quite so jungle like.

Sunday 30 May – Tuesday 1 June : Bank Holiday Weekend

Nothing, basically we have done absolutely nothing over this Bank Holiday. This was in part due to the weather in the main was due to a lack of cash. We did have a small BarBQ on Monday afternoon but that’s about it. Stayed up too late and slept in too long. Deb managed to get an hour in at the allotment on Sunday morning whilst the rest of us slumbered in the arms of Morpheus. I did post some stupid jokes to Facebook and Twitter based on different European Countries Terror Alert Status’s and these picked up a few likes on FB. Other than that Sod All … aren’t we a Fricking Boring Bunch of Barstools!

Whoopee; Deb’s just bought me The Hanged Man as my present “from the kids” for Father’s Day! I keep telling Nat that I expect his Blog entries to be a minimium of two hundred words. it would appear that at present I’ve not lived up to my own standards! What on earth am I to do, should I stop now in the hope the the day will provide more to say later or should I waffle on to the two hundred repeating words unnecessarily repeatedly whenever the opportunity to repeat them presents itself. That would seem to be a very underhand strategy especially if I used it repeatedly! Hold on; the last word in that last sentence was the Two Hundred and Twenty Fourth Word so the debate is moot! I’m so glad I didn’t have to cheat, I mean what kind of impression would that have made?