Admitting Defeat: I'm Never Going To Get This Blog Fully Up To Date

Its 03:07 on Tuesday 17 May and I've come to the conclusion that I must never let this blog fall behind again. I've just been flicking through all the holding posts and trying to remember what it was that I meant to write. OK some of them I can fill in because I've made reasonably decent notes in Word or they are waiting for me to upload the appropriate photos and videos , which I can now do having worked out that I've still got a about 3 gigs unused Google free space. I'm going to have to bite the bullet though and buy some space because it's been the problem of trying to organise the photos via either Ovi or Zooomr that's caused all the problems.

So then what about today (Monday 16) what did I, or anyone else in the family for that matter, do of significance...or otherwise?

After Deb and the Kids left I hot footed it to the PC to do...what? Nothing particularly specific, catch up on Google feeds, Tweets etc. Well whatever I was doing occupied me until nearly 14:00 when finally I decided I'd best go to bed. One thing of note was that not buying cider meant I just had a few weak beers in the fridge and a few of these had no effect on me and so I didn't wake later feeling the effects of too much booze.

I tried to stay up to watch the last launch of the Space Shuttle Endeavour but unfortunately it wasn't due to lift off until about 15:00 and I just couldn't stay up that long. So off to bed and time to see how long I can listen to a podcast before falling asleep. Sorry Jamila (Presenter of the Outriders podcast) but you weren't able to keep me awake and I'm afraid I'm going to have to play you again.

Deb woke me early because she and Nat had to go out and so we were having tea a little earlier than normal. Grabbed a quick showered and came down. Deb had an emergency Governors meeting at Brockington to discuss reducing staff salaries (the school's thinking of applying for Academy status) and Nat was going to help out at Cubs. If he does this for 6 months that will fulfil the community service element of his Queens Scout course.

This meant that I was left with Hannah and a slight problem. I had to leave for work at 7:00 but Deb wouldn't be home until 8:15 so what to do with her during the intervening period. I was supposed to lock her in but I agreed she could play out with the girls so long and Harleen's Dad was outside. I made sure she had her phone and planned to call her when I got to work.

I got to work around 7:30 and gave her a call; no answer her phone kept ringing until it went to voice mail. I tried calling Deb but her phone, as usual, was set to silent so she didn't respond. Next I tried Shantell's Mum Lidia but it seems she may have changed her number so in the end I called Donna who, God Bless Her drove down and checked everything was OK. Hannah also had her phone on silent and so hadn't known I was calling. Donna confirmed she was playing in Shantell's back garden so everything was OK.

I called Deb at 8:30 just to check. She was home. Nat had had a great time and Akala (Elaine) had confirmed that his helping out would qualify for the community service mentioned earlier. It seems he had a great time and Elaine said that he'd been great with the kids and hadn't been too rough. Thank God because he has no idea of just how strong he is. He'd knocked my glasses flying earlier on when we were messing round.

I forgot to mention that Brandon was around this evening the first time in a few weeks as he's been staying with his Dad while his Mum went on holiday

Work was very quiet tonight and its about bloody time, and there was nothing of consequence other than the fact that JDM said he was away next week which means we've got to change the plans we had to surprise him next Tuesday with a party to celebrate his 50th birthday. Looks like this will now happen on Wednesday. Gail and Abdul got their dates mixed up anyway and brought in food and chocolates this evening...whoops.

At least now I don't have a clash with JDM's bash and next Tuesday's Governors meeting where I think we are supposed to be going for a meal to say farewell to the Head John Simpson who's retiring at the end of term.

Nat's Blog, Ballistic Helmet, Skiing Trip, Last Chance sallon, Gadget Show, Lego, Overtime Planning, Twitter

I was right, the Blog issue came to a head tonight; I’d been in bed all day and I’d gradually been getting more and more annoyed. Nat wants to go skiing and had promised to start writing his blog everyday (it’s only 50 f**king words for Gods sake now Deb’s in charge) but yet again it hadn’t been done. As far as I was concerned not only was he repeatedly breaking a promise but he was now taking the piss and treating us with utter contempt. He will never know how close he came to losing that trip as he did this evening. I’d had enough, he’s got f**king dyspraxia and if he doesn’t deal with it now it’ll screw his life over just as it did mine. I should have made my living out of writing but instead I was scared of it for forty years. So after a calm build up lasting a good thirty seconds I put on my “Going F**KING Ballistic Helmet” and gave him both barrels of shit full on in his face (God knows how many rules of grammar I’ve probably just broken in that previous sentence) in fact at one point I did decide that I’d had enough he’d crossed too many lines and skiing was history. The penny didn’t drop; it was only a few minutes later that he realised what I’d said and that he’d blown it. It was like being called into the office and being fired it the finality takes a few minutes to sink in. He ran for his bedroom and was in tears. I let him stew in his juices before I offered him his FINAL (hope UR reading this Nat) and I do mean Final chance. The next time he misses one he loses his skiing trip; then it’s a downhill slide from there, Scouts will be next, then Rugby, then Judo, the Boxing, the GamesWorkshop and finally his X-box and PC. I don’t want to do this but if I have to I will. His future is far more important than him not hating me. If that’s the price I’ve got to pay then so be it!!!

NAT UR DRINKING IN THE LAST CHANCE SALOON

Apparently Nat’s doing something to do with Lego and the USA but I was in no mood to be interested he’ll have to tell me tomorrow. I then watched the Gadget Show and had dinner before leaving for work. I decided that I would take advantage of the overtime on offer (at double bubble = £25 per hour) and put myself down to do

2 hours on Wednesday 18:55 – 20:55

2 hours on Thursday ditto

5 hours on Friday 19:00 – 00:00

6 hours on Saturday 18:00 – 00:00

6 hours on Sunday 18:00 – 00:00

I couldn’t decide whether to do Monday evening too as this would be my only night off before our shift started again on Tuesday. Mind you I’m only in for three days next week as we’re off to Cornwall on Saturday and Alf and Doreen are visiting on Friday to take Nat out for a birthday meal – he becomes a teenager the day before Thursday 14 October…WTF did the time go?

C is now sitting next to me where Ash used to sit and I spent some of the night explaining how Twitter worked to her. The rest of the time was spent writing the previous entries on this blog, Twittering and reading my Google feeds. Now I’ve only got to write an additional twenty words to have reached the magic six hundred. Four More To Go!

Swimming With Jacob; Sailing With Scouts

Wednesday

Today was very wet in fact it was very very wet.  Why was it so wet? You might ask well there are two reasons you will have to wait for the second one but I will tell you the first one. The first reason is that I went swimming to Enderby with Jacob, Josh, who is Jacob’s brother, and Zak. While we were there we played a game were three people had to get a float from one end of the pool to the other sounds easy well it is for the first ten seconds because after those ten seconds a chaser is let lose on you.

The Second reason it was wet was because I went sailing with Scouts.    First I got picked up by Darren and he took, Jonathon, George and me sailing.

Once there we met Jacob, Zak, Brandon and the rest of the troop – Yahoo NO BEN.

Once Jacob and I had our life jackets on we got into our ‘pink’ boat this was the only ‘pink’ boat and took to the water. Jonathon ‘the wimp’ went in the leaders’ boat because he didn’t want to get wet!!!!!!!!!!!!

We sailed around and got attacked by Darren who has a super soaker, but also he capsized twice ha ha ha…..

Later on we purposefully capsized our boat twice – the 1^st time I got my leg caught on the sail the 2nd time I was at the front and got wet.  We also jumped into the water multiple times – I even jumped in when we were moving at speed and was abandoned by Jacob in the middle of the lake. Well maybe not the middle it was close to the shore but not to close.

By Nat (The Ginster) Jones 

Sunday at the Leicester Mela, Apple, iPhone

Today I went to the Mella in the centre town which is a big Indian festival in Leicester which is were I live. While we (we being me and my family) were there we got some free gingerbread men, a bag, a glass of Rubicon, an Ice poll, two Frisbees,  some biscuits, a balloon and a whistle that's right a whistle a free whistle and to make it better it was on a lanyard a whistle on a lanyard for free how amazing. Also when we were in town I went into Men Kind and Red 5 which are gadget shops that sell things that I like E.G. water guns, robots, jokey things and other novelties while I was in there my dad was in the Apple store and I joined him later to have a look at the signal drop on the iPhone 4. When you hold it in your left hand the signal drops off dramatically, as the antenna gets covered by your skin. This is a serious design flaw but you can always buy a Apple certified case. These were £40!!!! but Apple has finally bowed to pressure and made the available free of charge. I know something free from Apple; I fainted too!!!!!!!!!! Mind you, they only did this after first saying that this happens to all smart phones! Totally Bogus; Damn You Apple!

Nat's blog Wednesday again but this time I am talking about Scouts.

Wednesday again but this time I am talking about Scouts.

At Scouts I got a black eye from the fat ginger twat Known as Ben god I hate that fat shity dick sucking FUCKTARD!! There is only one person who is worse then him that person is Henri who same as the above insults but worse and with the added disses of a lair, a shit face, a c#nt and a knob jokey. Any way the basterd gave me a black eye by elbowing my in the face he also hurt Joseph’s leg by dropping a log on it and Jacobs Foot by standing on it with his full 1000 of tons of weight. As a result I punched him in the stomach and made him double over and next week I am going to capsize his boat when we go sailing with scouts Ben you are going to swim with the fishes MU HA HA HA HA!!!!!  HA. As well as this we made Chinese lanterns and mine said Ben you are a dick on the side, when we went to set them lose my team set a record of the longest time with out catching fire at three minutes not one lantern has never flown ever in the history of Forth Leicester Scouts so I am the best go me go me go me go me and one last time go me’ and the number of words is 240.      

Nat's Blog: Drayton Manor Park School Trip

Wednesday

Today was one of the best days of the year because we went to Drayton Manor Park and Zoo. I was dropped off at Brocko by my Mum so that I could attend Breakfast Club. Before I continue I would just like to say that my dad is an inconsistent idiot as he asks me to write this and then calls me over to watch the TV I think he wants to ruin my Sumer holidays and stop me going on my Xbox (“I do” Dad). Anyway back to writing about my day at Drayton Manor Park and Zoo (can you tell I am making every thing as long as possible E.G. Drayton Manor Park and Zoo to take up as many words as possible like this line I did not have to write this line at all and it's the same with this one I mean am I right or am I right or am I right I definitely am but which one is the correct right). Anyway we (we being my form now and later the group I was in) went to the sports hall and were then sent to the different buses we were on number three we then had a very fast bus trip to Drayton Manor Park and Zoo. 

When we got there the first ride I went on was Maelstrom which is a ride that spins and swings you it was immense, next up was rocky rapids a water ride although not a very wet one at all, Soon after was storm force ten although it was a massive twenty minuet wait and again I came of dry while every one else was soaked but never mind it was a great ride because your not on a track your boat actually jumps and you can see the drop if you are at the front which of course I was.  Later that day but not much later I went on a ride called the WILD WEST SHOOT OUT YE HA on which we had to go around on a cart shooting things with a laser tag pistol my score was 8000 which is a very high score although the high score this year was 30,000. Next I went on APOCALYPSE which is so fast you go up and when you get to the top ten seconds later you are at the bottom it was so fast and epic I want to go on it again and then possibly a third time!!! Next I went on Pandemonium a ride which spins you round and round and you guessed it round on this ride I almost fell out of my seat when we were upside down like when I was on a similar ride in Alton Towers. Soon after this I went with a friend on one of the scariest rides it comes after the Ferris wheel and hook a duck this ride is called the Flying Dutch Man soon after we went on Shock Wave well queued for it as when we got to the ride we had to go back to the coach but we were still late but did not get shouted at as the teachers understood we could not of got out of the queue so after this we got back to Brocko and went home.        

Nat's blog,red vs blue,nats notes,uniform,

Monday

 Last day of school, well at least in school uniform. In fact if it was not induction day we would not have been wearing school uniform at all this week. Because nothing else happened today I will show you the Bungie Day celebration video by Red vs. Blue.

As you can see from the video not only do Bungie love us but also they are letting us out of the canyon at Comic-Con 2010. Judging from the last few scenes of the video this map is going to be VERY VERY BIG!!! As well as this you will notice the Warthog with missiles on the back and a new armor ability that uses a hologram that  Simons demonstrates very well. Sarge is the luckiest as he has a new way to greet people but we all know this as an assassination move. Grif was right at home straight away as he was sleeping on the job after three minutes. Sarge also had a spell of bad luck as he is going to have to bankrupt the UNSC to pay of the water bill because Simons left on the sprinklers when they left three years ago. It is not just the reds who went home the blues went too. It is going to be a great season of Red vs. Blue next year.               

Nat's blog,custom map

Sunday
Today started with a nice lie in until ten to eleven o’clock  and straight away Jacob rang asking to come round and go on the Xbox even though he has his own one mine just that much better as mine is well mine. When he came round we went on the box of x and played halo 3 were we created a zombie map with traps and shize and mongooses well the mongooses were added later but there had to be mongooses as mongooses are the best motorized things in Halo with there speed and brilliant turning capabilities and you can have a guy on the back with a BRUT SHOT init man mongooses are so gikster or gangster as some one with out a speech impediment would say. On a related note I have been working on traps and as a result I will make a trap map to demonstrate my impressive abilities at trapping so watch this space or don’t I do not care at all it is not my problem if you die because you don’t know enough about me when I take over the world. Ten more words to do I don’t know what to put oh wait I’m there.

Nat to Josh's Birthday BarBQ Sat / Fri / Thursday

Saturday

Today was EPIC, brilliant and utterly awesome in nearly every way. You may be thinking to yourself why is this, what made this day so great, well if you SHUT UP and listen I will tell you. It started off with me getting up at around nine O'Clock and although this does not sound so great but what made it great was going on the Xbox straight away. Later that day at six O'Clock I went to Jacob's house to celebrate Joshes birthday with a barbecue (and boy do I love barbecues). What happened at this barbecue? Lots of cool things: millions of gangster things plus epic things and funny things too. 

It started of with me putting one Xbox controller in my bag along with my water gun and one spare mag. Next I cycled up to Jacob's and played an old GameCube game at lest I think it was for the GameCube it might just have been a Wii game or some other shize. I only played two games of it as it was a tournament and I was terrible at the game and everyone else was very good at it and so I gust went outside and soaked some people with my water gun which was fun in fact soaking any one with a water gun is great family fun for every one not like High School Musical or bratz or even Hannah (the hated) Montana don't those names send a shiver down your spine because they do to me and as in the honored word of family guy damn nature your scary ramen to that (if you don't know what those are there noodles American noodles). After that we went inside and played on Modern Warfare two an OK game but it was great at Jacob's because we insulted Americans and one of the Americans called Jacob a RETARD can you believe it because I can not in fact it was a disgrace a total disgrace I demand a war MU HA HA HA and if you are taking me seriously or think I am being serious go and have a brain put in your head because I'm not a terrorist or a jihadist or an American and I'm not going to blow up robin hood airport or eat a turtle or send a twitter about it so go suck eggs you terrorist init and that's four hundred words right there. Soon after that little incident we had burgers yum yum yum burgers they were so bugery and meaty and tasty and cheesy because of the cheese and it had HP sauce on delicious. Soon after that I had another burger and then we had a Nerf and water fight speaking of Nerf there have been some new guns confirmed!!!  

 The Rev 5        

             
 Soon after we went on the trampoline and I soaked even more people with you guest it my water gun well what else would I use a banana or a random dude called Bob.