Monday 28 Sept - Cycled to School and "The Nurses"

Nat has finally received his cycle pass for school. This morning he cycled there for the first time. I went with him because he had to cross some major roads and it seemed sensible to be there the first time. We did it in about 25 minutes so he'll have to be ready to leave home at 8:00 AM at the latest.
Got home in time for my appointment at the surgery to have my blood taken and a flu jab. I'd not been able to eat since 10:00 PM so by now my stomach was rumbling fit to burst. No big deal, came home had beer and cheese and biscuits. Mind you, my legs are killing me!

Tuesday 29 Sept - Rode to School Again - Henry Joined Us.

Nat and I cycled to school again this morning. This time we were joined by Henry who started cycling today. It'll be good if he's going to cycle everyday because then they can cycle together and look out for each other.

Nat Cooks Dinner - Spaghetti Carbonara (This should be dated Sat 26)

Today,for the first time ever, Nat cooked dinner. He cooked Spaghetti Carbonara a dish he learned at Scouts the previous Wednesday. Below is a picture of SC taken from a cookery site and uder this are photos of his attempt. I'm sure we'll all agree that this was a damned fine effort. In addition it tasted fabulous.

Now here's what his looked like.

Computing 4 Girls

Girls Computer - Cool - Funny Pictures, Funny Videos, Cool Videos, Humor for geeks in all of us!

25 Sept - Swine Flu and A Pentel Award

Well, all the Team seem to be in the clear vis Swine Flu, it appears, fingers crossed, that Hasmukh didn't infected the rest of us. Of course, as is usual for this time of year, we're all coughing and sniffling and sneezing but we all seem to be free of anything that's virulent. The vaccine's due to be available some time in November according to tonight's TV News, I'm getting the seasonal jab next Monday, and of course it'll be a prime example of the operation of Sods Law to come down with the damned thing just before I'm due to get that jab.

Who's a clever girl? Han is, of course, it seems she's won the Bronze award in a Pentel Art contest. A contest that she entered in school last term and, of course, this being Han one where she can no longer recall what it was that she actually did; given that Pentel don't send back the entries it appears that this is destined always to remain a family mystery?

Sept. 25, 2002: Mystery Meteorite Dazzles Siberia

Sept. 25, 2002: Mystery Meteorite Dazzles Siberia: "A huge fireball lights up the skies and causes a tremendous explosion. But where's the crater?

"

WTP 259: Iraq Internet Regs, Africa Connected, NComputing, and Autism Detection Software

WTP 259: Iraq Internet Regs, Africa Connected, NComputing, and Autism Detection Software: "It's Friday, I'm in Love. With technology, I mean. We've got a look at a new measure that may curtail Internet access in Iraq. Also, Africa's broadband fibre-optic cable goes live, and we'll get reactions. Stephen Dukker from NComputing talks about how to turn one PC into 10 or more. And we end with some software designed to detect autism in infants and children."

I need to look into ncomputing to see if there's anything that could be of use to our school.

Starbucks rewards punters with free Wi-Fi

Starbucks rewards punters with free Wi-Fi: "

Sick of plonking yourself down in your favourite coffee chain only to find you need to stump up for the Wi–Fi? Well a new deal between Starbucks and BT Openzone means that such online disasters are over. Read on and we’ll tell you just how this new hook up works.

To get stuck into free Wi–Fi at Starbucks, you’ll need to sign on the dotted line for a Starbucks Reward card. Once you’ve got involved with the coffee king’s latest wheeze, you’ll be able to log on and check your emails while mainlining triple–shot Americanos.

Before playing nice with Outlook, Facebook or Twitter, load your Starbucks reward card up with £5 of credit and register it at the Starbucks website. If you’ve already got a reward card, you’re good to go.

Honda U3-X: self-balancing unicycle

Honda U3-X: self-balancing unicycle: "

The Honda U3-X may look like a post-modern stool for yuppies, but it’s something even more out there: it’s a self-balancing, motorised unicycle with 360 degree movement. Read on to find out how it works and see it in action.

Similar to how the two-wheeled Segway works, the Honda U3-X can speed up, slow down and turn by shifting your bodyweight when you’re sitting on the bonce of it. But although it only appears to have one wheel, it actually has lots of tiny little ones, meaning you can move instantly in any direction, even diagonally.

The Honda U3-X is based on the same balance control as everyone’s favourite robot, Asimo, and takes a good dose of his space age white styling too. It’ll drive for one hour on a charge at the moment and weighs in under 10kg.

As you’ve probably guessed, there’s no release date on the Honda U3-X (Hey, when did you last see Asimo chilling on a shop shelf?), but it’s expected to be shown off at the Tokyo Motor Show so you can count on more nonsense then. In the meantime, mash that play button and watch the Honda U3-X go!

IF I CAN'T HAVE A SEGWAY CAN I HAVE ONE OF THESE INSTEAD, PLEASE?

"

Tursday 24 Sept - Swine Flu Finally Hits Our Team!!!!

Guess what Hasmukh's got? Bloody bad timing, his Dad was rushed into hospital last night and this AM he's diagnosed with the dreaded SF. He was at work last night so wether or not he's infected any of us is a moot point, time, I imagine, will tell!

Quite Interesting fact and quotation of the day

Quite Interesting fact and quotation of the day: "
According to modern cosmologists, the universe consists of 70% dark energy and 25% dark matter. No one knows what or where either of these are. All the stars and galaxies, the entire observable universe, which consist of so-called 'ordinary' matter, make up only 5% of what the universe 'should' be.

---

“Cosmology is still not a proper science.”

STEPHEN HAWKING 1999

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Wed Sept 23 - Katie Would Have Been Ten Today, Musical Geography, Poorly Han Recovers and Back2 Work.

Today would have been, if she's lived, our daughter Katie's tenth birthday. Unfortunately, instead, she was born dead on this day in 1999 after managing to get her umbilical cord wrapped round her neck five days before. Silly girl she was due to be born at the end of the month. Unbelievable really, due date 30/9/99 strangled 18/9/99. So close yet so far. We all went to the cemetery to place flowers on her grave when he kids got home from school. It's become a tradition, every birthday and Xmas eve the kids cover her grave in leaves to keep her warm, that's because when he was tiny Nat was worried that she's be cold and thought putting leaves on top of her would help keep her warm. The kids section where she's buried was filled a few years ago, the babies are now buried in another area, and so this area is getting very overgrown. We really must get her a headstone and include Hans name on it. I often wonder what Caitlin Rebbecca Anwin Jones would have turned out like if she'd lived? It's weird, most of the time it seems like this happened a life time ago in a dimly remembered past but if I specifically think about the day we found out Sunday 19th and the day she was born Thurs 23/9 and the following 24 hours we kept her for it's as if every single detail is permanently etched into my brain in high definition. Isn't that odd?

On a happier note, when we got home it was time to help Nat with his first geography home work; which was to write a song about where he lives. As of the time of writing we've come up with the following sung to the tune of Narwhals:-

Nathaniel Nathaniel living on the Kingsway
In the town of Braunstone being pretty awesome,
Nathaniel Nathaniel living on the Kingsway
Very green and very wide, fifty metres side to side.

Fosse Park is near by just up the Narbro Road
to Borders Dad and I Go....................................
...............................................................................

Back to work tonight and I feel like sh*t, I think I've got whatever it is that Han has had. The aforementioned, on the other hand, appears fully recovered and is off to school in the morning; where's the justice I ask you?

Spent the night doing EA which wasn't too busy until Hasmukh, who was on manuals, had to leave because his Dad had been rushed into hospital. I took over manuals as well and ensured that both were completed before I finished at 7:30on Thursday morning.

Saturday 19 - Tuesday 22 Quite Interesting fact and quotation of the day

Finished work on Saturday morning and home too sleep. Can't recall much about the weekend like most, these days, seems like I did an awful lot of not very much.

Monday - Kids too school Deb to work...............PEACE at last!!!!!!!!! Spent most of the day mooching about. Still haven't got a plan of how to spend my off days; my hips severely constrain outside activities but now the schools are back perhaps I could do more as a Governor at Han's school. There's a Governors meeting on Tuesday evening so we'll see what comes up.

Nat got more merit points at school today; he's averaging one a day at present and I think his ambition now is to sustain that for the whole year. He gets most of them for answering questions ion class; unfortunately it appears that his teachers are beginning to cotton on to how extensive his General Knowledge is and are asking the other kids to answer first.

Tuesday - No school today for Han; she's come down with a nasty case of the Lurgies. I called the school to advise them and was told that there was a bug doing the rounds. She was really poorly all of Tuesday and most of Wednesday but seemed better by late Wed afternoon.

It was the first Governors meeting of the year this evening and so there was quite a full agenda to get through; technically I'm no longer a Governor (my term expired at the end of last school year [4 yrs...where did it go?] and if I want to continue in post I'll need to stand for election shortly) but I'm still being treated as one at the moment. I need to contact the Deputy Head and get up to speed with whats happening on the I.C.T. front as i have responsibility for this area. I'll contact Steve for a meeting and write a full report for the next meeting. That way if I'm out on my uppers at least my replacement will be able to get up to speed reasonably quickly. We were finished for about 8:30 (started 6:30) and I was home for 9:00. Had a few beers and Chillaxed - I love that word but I suppose it would be equally appropriate to say that I Relled.

Tomorrow, the 23rd of September, is not a happy memory day for Deb or I.






Quite Interesting fact and quotation of the day: " 20/9/09

The dungeon-master at London's popular sadomasochism haunt "Club Wicked" is also the founder member of the world's only S&M troupe of Morris dancers.

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“To me, boxing is like a ballet, except there's no music, no choreography, and the dancers hit each other.” JACK HANDY

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testing video

han & mommy on the couch

1st Moblog

here I an sitting at my PC SEEING HOW LONG IT WILL TAKE OF TO blog from my phone.
Deb and Han are out at the moment at ballet and Nat is at slash camp with scouts.
This is not as east as on the Pc but its not bad.

As you can see it's easy to accidently chaNGE FONTS BUT THEN THAT'S PHONES FOR YOU.

Friday 18 Sept - Feeling Weird

I've not been able to sleep properly for days. Everytime I go to bed my knee is so painfull that I can't get to sleep and when I finally do drop off I wake up again after a little while. Today I decided that I had to get some uninterupted kip and so I took t:43 PM and I still feel like my head is full of cotton woool, I've had to take some paracetamol to try to get rid of the horrible headache I woke up with and every time I stand I feel as if I'm about to fall over. I'm going to have to ask the Doc for some different pain killers as these are obviously not right for me. I've got a carrier bag next to me because in addition to the above I constantly feel as if I'm about to throw up.

To Good to Lose - Thank You The Onion - Let Me Show You Our New Line Of Bullshit

Excuse me, sir, I couldn't help but notice you checking out our bullshit section over here. Now, most of the people that come in here don't know what they're looking for, but I see you and I say to myself, this guy, this is the kind of guy I can manipulate until he purchases something he doesn't need. So, tell me, what can I do to send you home with some of our bullshit?
Now what you're looking at there, that's a pretty decent bit of bullshit. But if you're really looking to take it to the next level, I've got a line of bullshit that is going to knock your socks off. That crap? That's for idiots. But you, on the other hand, I can clearly tell, are a complete fucking moron. You want a perfunctory compliment and a meaningless question? Nice tie. Where'd you get it?
Let me establish a superficial intimacy here by asking you your first name. It's Bob? Okay, I'm going to go out on a limb here, Bob—you look like the kind of guy who appreciates quality bullshit. I have an eye for these things. I can see you're a nice guy, but dumb as hell, so I'm going to go ahead and take you for all you've got.
Can I put my arm around you and be disingenuous with you for a second? I like you, so I'm going to help you out. Walk with me. I'm going to show you the real bullshit.
Now, I know what you're thinking: "This guy must really think he's talking to a dummy here." And that's true. But I want you to know that it's simpletons like you who make this the greatest job in the world.
Bob, we're both adults here, so let me talk down to you like a child. Take a look at this shelf. Your first instinct is that you probably want this bullshit, don't you? No, you don't. Sure, this bullshit does everything you need, but it's a little less than you're going to want to spend. Over here, now, this is more along your lines. A little pricier, but with fewer features and longer, more convoluted explanations of what they do.
Hold on to your pants, though, 'cause this is our newest line of bullshit. It's not your run-of-the-mill standard bullshit—we're talking primo stuff. State of the art, bullshit-wise. Just got this in from France. You believe that, right? This is the best bullshit you can get. You got a family? You got kids? They're going to love this bullshit. Trust me, Bob, you've never seen bullshit like this before.
Sure, you could go across the street and buy the same bullshit for half the price, but I guarantee you—I guarantee you!—they won't treat you like half the dipshit I will.
Whoa, whoa, I feel like I'm losing you. Okay, hold on. Let me sweeten the deal. You buy this bullshit right now, and I'll throw in some of that useless crap over there. I can't do much more than that. I'm practically robbing you. Level with me: What do I have to do to convince you that you're getting a deal here? Should I speak faster or just louder?
Listen, Bob, I've really come to like you. I don't want to BS you, so let me just flat-out lie. This bullshit is guaranteed to make your life more satisfying. What else do you want to hear? You'll earn more money, be more attractive to women, people will respect you? Sure. Guaranteed. Done deal.
If you have any doubts left at all, get ready to have them blown out of the water, because this bullshit is satisfaction guaranteed. For a meager $100 extra, I'll throw in an eco-friendly paperless two-year bullshit warranty that won't do shit and that you'll never need.
You like that? All right—I knew that'd put you over the top. Now, let's head on over to the cash register and see if we can accidentally swipe your card more than once, huh?

Friday 11 Sept – Tuesday 15 Sept - Sleep, Dreams, Poorly Han, Travelling Nat, Brandon, Lions & Vipers, Floyd, Swayze and Poetry

General - There’s not a lot to record, at least for me, because I seem to have slept through most of the daytime hours. The problem is my hip; it’s very painful when I’m lying down, more painful than at any other time it often seems, and, as a result of this, I have experienced very broken sleep patterns for quite sometime. I think, finally, that this weekend this caught up with me; I’ve been endless dropping off on the sofa. Of course as a result I’m wide awake through the night and end up not going to bed. There’s an upside; I’ve caught up on all the back episodes of Spooks and Sons of Anarchy (2 fantastic series). The V+ box has not had this much free space on it since we first go it! If Deb and the kids did anything exciting I missed it; in all likelihood because I was asleep.

Friday – Be gone foul Phlatpac of Ikeyer I, using the Sword of BnQ; banish you to the Warehouses of Not Ting Ham! Neither you nor the Evil Al Lenkey of Nuckelscrape shall ever return to plague me ….Zzzzzzzzzzz. Well that’s all I remember!

Saturday - Han was poorly over the weekend and so missed the restart of ballet training after the summer break. She also didn’t seem very interested in playing with the kids next door either, so she spent most of the weekend listening to Harry Potter on her iPod and doing girly things on my PC; GoGo you multitasking girlie you!

Nat travelled into Leicester, on Saturday, to the GamesWorkshop with a new friend from Brockington, Brandon, who turns out to be a fellow Warhammer fanatic. Nat, apparently, knew Brandon when he used to attend the same cubs group as he did but they lost touch when Brandon joined a different Scout group. Well, now that they both attend Brockington and share, it seems, a love of Warhammer 40,000 the friendship has been renewed; it helps, from Nat’s point of view, that Brandon’s got a shed of his own in his garden! Apparently Brandon was at our place playing Warhammer with Nat on Friday evening, I wouldn’t know as I was asleep upstairs dead to the World.

Sunday - Nat reported that The Vipers under 12’s team were getting lots of new blood turning up, apparently from the Lions Club nearby, because, it appears that, this year, the Lions can’t get enough kids coming to their club to sustain either an under 12’s nor an under 8’s team. Given that the bloke who that trains them is a Total Tosser ( the most hated biased referee you will ever have the misfortune to encounter) I’m hardly surprised that a lot of the Lion’s kids have voted with their feet this year. Youth rugby is not the place for adults to try and live out their failed dreams through their kids!! Well Nat, you’ll have to fight for your place now my boy and I expect you to win the Caps that I never did!!!!!! Han still a bit down.

Monday – Die War D Robe of DFS Zzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz??????? Watched Waking the Dead over night; boy, if you didn’t hate nuns by the end of the first story then there’s something wrong with you. It’s not just the male members of the clergy who indulge in child abuse, evil witches!

Tuesday – Having stayed awake over night on both Sunday and Monday (possibly sat too) and with my new shift starting that night I decided I would do the bed thing as soon as good old JK had done his show. Dragged myself off too bed at 10:30 for a day’s broken sleep. My knee is incredibly painful when I’m in bed and throughout the day I kept waking and sleeping and waking and sleeping and so by the time Deb woke me at 6pm I was totally knackered. Really looking forward to work tonight….NOT!!

Whilst having dinner I heard on the news that Keith Floyd the first and greatest of the celebrity chefs (cooks as he would have said) had died. It’s a good thing that I’m a sceptic or I would have ascribed the fact that I had watched a documentary about him the previous day to more than co-incidence. It would have been proof of mystical forces at work…..WOW!!!!! Poor old Floyd he’s gone and done the final celebrity no-no, he’s been daft enough to have died on the same day as some one more famous than him (just like poor old Farah Fawcett did in July)
Patrick Swayze died today from pancreatic cancer.

Nat has to write a poem about himself as part of his RE (religious education – what an oxymoron) homework. I came up with the following:

I Am Nat; Nat I Am
I Do Enjoy Brockington?
That Nat I Am, That Nat I Am,
Should He Be At Brockington?
I Aced My Sats So Spin You TWATS!!!

I’m loath to suggest that he uses this offering of mine so let’s try and do better shall we? What Nat didn’t made clear, at least at first, was that the poem was limited to five lines; so, that’s Beowulf and Coleridge knocked on the head!

So what are the alternatives? The standard form of a limerick, a stanza of five lines, with the first, second and fifth having eight or nine syllables and rhyming with one another, and the third and fourth having five or six and rhyming separately (flash git), utilizes five lines, so lets try that.

There was a young man called Nathaniel,
Often, in error, called Daniel
He’s at a new school that he found kind of cool.
Least he did; till he read the rules manual

And just so she doesn’t feel left out:-

There is a young lady called Hannah
Who in no way resembled a Spanner!
But in a Birmingham School, if she’s a bit of a Tool
They’ll Name her in just such a Manner.

We could try a lanterne poem; Lanterne where the first line has one syllable, the second line two syllables, the third line three syllables, the fourth line four syllables and the fifth line one syllable. I think the following works:-

Nat
Is At
Brock Ing Ton
His New Sch Ool
Cool

To a Skylark (Percy Bysshe Shelley) Shelly’s poem uses a unique five line stanza with a three beat line except for the fifth line, which doubles the number beats of the other lines, and it has a rhyme scheme that is consistently 'ababb.'

Hail to thee, blithe Spirit!
Bird thou never wert,
That from Heaven, or near it,
Pourest thy full heart
In profuse strains of unpremeditated art

To a Zit (more appropriate for prepubescent boys)

Hail to thee, bleak spot!
Cute thou never wert,
That from Blemish or near it,
Pore-est thy pustule heart,
In profuse stains of unpreventable acne!

Well that’s enough verse for tonight because I fear that bad as the foregoing might be any more would only be worse!

It's 04:28 and time for lunch - Chilli and Rice......Nice!!!!!

Thursday 10 Sept - RANT!!!!!

I finish work tomorrow morning and I've decided that I have to do something, for a change, to give me something to write about. Perhaps this could be the motivation to get off my arse, ignore the pain, do something and then write about for no one to read! BUT WHAT?

On a different point all together, anyone seen the latest pictures from the Hubble Telescope? Why do you want to believe religious bull when you can be overwhelmed by these photos? Human beings, the ones that think anyway, have managed to photograph things that happened billions, not millions, but billions of years ago, how fantastic is that? Just look at these:-
A dying star unleashes streams of ultraviolet radiation and superheated gas that glow against the darkness of space. This object is an example of a planetary nebula, so-named because many of them have a round appearance resembling that of a planet when viewed through a small telescope.

Some people will look at these pictures and see the hand of GOD at work (unless they're young Earth creationist who'll see it as God playing a trick with the speed of light), but how do you reconcile this view of an Almighty God with the petty God that banished Adam and Eve from the Garden of Eden. This God is the God that put a talking snake into The Garden. A talking snake that he had "designed" (one for you ID freaks out there in laalaa land, OR KANSAS AS THE REST OF US CALL IT). If the snake was able to persuade Eve to persuade Adam to do the one thing that God had forbidden them from doing it was only able to do so because God had made it that way... and that makes NO Sense, if he's a loving God! This isn't a loving God, this is one fucked up sadist. The cosmic equivalent of the evil little bastard who pulls the wings off of flys and isn't a child! However depressing may be the thought of eternal oblivion the thought of spending eternity with this cunt is far worse!

Wednesday 9/9/9 - Beware the Hand-Standing Anti-Christ

We'll only have 3 more dates like this this century, after 12/12/12 that's it until 01/01/2101 by which time, barring a major scientific break-through and the adoption of a sensible World population limitation policy, we'll all be dead. Now there's a cheering thought to start the day with!

This was supposed to be a joke but read this:-

MEXICO CITY – A Bolivian religious fanatic briefly hijacked a jetliner from the beach resort of Cancun as it landed in Mexico City on Wednesday, police said. All passengers and the crew were released unharmed.

The Bible-carrying hijacker used a juice can he said was a bomb to hold the 103 passengers and crew on the tarmac for more than an hour. Masked police stormed the aircraft with their guns drawn and escorted several handcuffed men away without firing a shot. Police later said there was only one hijacker.

Jose Flores, 44, told investigators he hijacked Aeromexico Flight 576 after a divine revelation, according to Public Safety Secretary Genaro Garcia Luna. Flores said Wednesday's date — 9-9-09 — is the satanic number 666 turned upside down.

Flores, speaking to reporters after he was detained, said he took control of the aircraft with "a juice can with some little lights I attached."

"Christ is coming soon," he added, smiling.

As the plane was landing, Flores stood up and showed his contraption to a flight attendant, saying he and three others were hijacking the plane, Garcia Luna said. Flores later told police his three companions were "the Father, the Son, and the Holy Ghost."

He ordered the pilot to circle over Mexico City seven times and asked to speak with Mexican President Felipe Calderon, saying he wanted to warn him of an impending earthquake, Garcia Luna said.

Garcia Luna said Flores is a drug addict who was convicted of armed robbery in Bolivia, and has lived in Mexico for 17 years. Flores described himself as a pastor in southern Oaxaca state who had gone to Cancun to preach.

The attorney general's office said it was opening an investigation into terrorism and kidnapping.

U.S., French and Mexican citizens were among the passengers, according to a U.S. official who had been briefed on the situation. The official was not authorized to discuss the case and spoke on condition of anonymity.

Passenger Rocio Garcia told the Televisa network that the pilot made an announcement after landing in Mexico City that the airplane was being hijacked.

"These were scary moments," she said.

Mexican officials negotiated the release of women and children through the pilot before sending in the police. The plane was isolated at the end of a runway in an area designed for emergencies and the airport remained open.

The most recent hijacking in the Americas occurred on April 19, when a man with a handgun tried to commandeer a Canadian jetliner from Jamaica. The standoff ended before takeoff at Montego Bay's airport when military commandos burst onto the plane and disarmed the man, who was described as "mentally challenged."

These people are off their heads, for "Gods" sake they really believe this crap!

Thursday 3 – Tuesday 8 Sept – School / First Telling Off / Missed Big Brother / Cosby Military Show / The Boys and the Nutter / Hygienist / Last Chanc

Well it’s Thursday morning and the start of a new term. Today Nat goes up to big school and once again becomes a little fish in a big pond. Han going to be a junior and before you know it she’ll be moving on.

After Deb picked me up at 7:30 we headed home hoping that the kids had eaten and dressed. Good God; they had, it’s a miracle. We had all piled into the car by 8:00 and set off for Enderby; not sure of traffic conditions on the first day of term we planned to give ourselves a time cushion. Traffic; not to bad, we dropped Nat at the gates around 8:20 and made our way around and out of the miniscule car park as quickly as we could so that we could now dump Han too. Much as I wished to we didn’t get out of the car with him, walk in with him, photograph him or get overtly physical, after all 11 yr old boys have their standards and these include not getting kissed by your Dad in the car park on your first day at your new school! I need Amanda Huggankiss.

We made it to Millfield with time to spare and exited, the car, to walk Han into school. Along the way we stopped to talk to Henry’s Mum Maxine (who’d just dropped Henry off in Enderby) whilst we were talking Han walked off and took herself to school.

Deb dropped me at home and then drove off to work. My knee hurt, I went in sat down and had a beer.

Most of the rest of the day passed in a haze of beer, tiredness and Jeremy Kyle. I think I dragged myself to bed about 12:00 but I can’t clearly remember. I know I was still in bed when the kids came home.

Nat was very pi**ed off, he’d been told off on his first day, in drama, for talking. We explained that teachers tended to do that kind of thing early on in order to establish their authority. Unfortunately Nat has a very strong sense of injustice and complained he’d only continued to speak because he hadn’t heard the teacher tell everyone to stop talking. Other than that, he’d had a great first day and said he loved the place. Getting info out of Han was, as usual like getting blood from a stone!

Friday, another day and I was shattered, this hip leaves one feeling exhausted; it’s the unending low level pain, interspersed by less low level pain, that drags you down and makes you as patient as a bear with a sore head. Had a falling out with everyone when they returned home and went to bed late afternoon. Missed the last episode of Big Brother, apparently Sophie won, and slept till morning.

Saturday, we’re going to Cosby except I’m still in a bad mood and decide I’m not going. Deb tries to talk me into going with them but to no avail. They leave and I immediately regret my decision. Do nothing for a few hours back to bed and stay there until Sunday. Apparently the event was great, the kids rode on a tank, Nat saw lots of military vehicles, he was particularly impressed by the tracked Bren gun carriers, and the only remaining flying Vulcan bomber flew low over the slow. MJ sometime you are a complete twat, I’ll have to go to next years War and Peace Show.

Sunday, I finally came down for lunch around 2:30pm and heard all about yesterday. Later, Henry (see above) and Alfie called to see if Nat wanted to go out on his bike with them. Off they went and Han played outside with the girls. About an hour later we heard Nat struggling to get his bike through the front door and as he pushed it into the room he was obviously in distress. At first we thought he’d fallen off his bike because he was in floods of tears and unable to form a coherent sentence. As we calmed him down it immerged that something far more sinister had happened. He was nearly hysterical, his trainers were soaked through with mud as were his jeans and his arms were also covered.
It transpired that he and the other two had been throwing sticks, chunks of wood into the steam down near the playing fields when they were approached by an older man, walking his dog, who said he was going to ring the police unless they got into the steam and removed all the wood. Alfie apparently had already left to go home for tea and Henry immediately legged it on his bike leaving Nat alone with this nutcase who virtually forced him into the water. Potentially this could have had tragic results as the banks are very steep and difficult to climb out of, in addition there is a very thick layer of mud in the stream bed that could easily cause someone to lose balance and fall into the water. Eventually the man left, telling Nat that he was reporting him to the Police, and Nat managed to extricate himself. He made his way home and this was how he came to be in the state he was when we first saw him. I went ballistic (see photos) and after getting some photos of Nat I got me bike and we went looking for the bastard. We headed toward the stream and over the playing fields and along to the canal trying to find him. I don’t know what I’d have done if we had. As we reached the canal Deb phoned to say that they’d (?) found out who the guy was and to come home. We cycled back to find Deb, Dave (Henry’s Dad) and a number of others congregated near the underpass.

Apparently, Henry, also in a state of distress, had rung his Dad (thank God for mobiles) and Dave had jumped into his car and gone looking for him. When Henry explained what had happened to him they too set off in search. Henry spotted the guy and Dave caught up with him. Apparently he was in his sixties and at first denied knowing anything about what they were talking about. Dave said, that if he’d have been younger he’d have given him a good hiding, as it was he put the fear of God in him and, as Dave put it, appeared as if he was going to wet himself. Unfortunately they hadn’t found out where he lived and he’d scampered off as soon as he could. A number of people who had stopped to find out what was happening said they thought they knew who he was and roughly where he lived. I’ll bide my time until I see him and then I’ll pounce. I won’t hit him I’ll just give him the same choice he gave the kids; pay to replace the clothes he ruined, trainers jeans etc or I’ll call the Police and report him for assault, lets see how he likes being on the receiving end…cunt! At least the chase had calmed Nat down and we went home. We all spent the rest of the evening watching the goggle box until bed time.

Monday, back to work tonight but first The Hygienist!! 12:20 in the chair having my teeth tortured would it ever end; another session next Monday and the following…Oh the Pain! Kids back from school, Nat enthusing about using the Bunsen Burners in the science labs. We watched the first episode of Last Chance to See, Stephen Fry’s new series following in the footsteps of the late Douglas Adams. As with virtually everything else he does, outstanding programme, I’m looking forward to the rest of the series, I was following him on Twitter whilst he made the later episodes so it’ll be interesting to see the scenes he twittered about. We also watched OWLS which a friend had sent to Deb on Facebook, then Narwhals then Badgers Oh God these are going to be stuck in my brain forever. Nat went to Kickboxing, Han went to Cubs and Deb drove me to work. I must watch video of The Gadget Show that’s on tonight later this week. Work...again, how quickly the four days off pass, especially if you spend most of them in bed! Also, given up alcohol for a while, I think my Liver needs a rest!

Tuesday, Home, watched the mad French bloke from X-factor on Youtube (I’d seen a report in the paper about him at work) and he was as bad as the article had said. Owls, Narwhals and Badgers again until finally the kids went to school.

Before going to bed I decided to watch the Tim Minchin Live video

I’d recorded it a few weeks before but after watching some of it with Nat I'd decided that it was a little too much even for my kids so decided to watch it while no one else was home. I nearly wet myself laughing, Christ why wasn’t I born with talent like that? I interrupted the recording part way through to watch Jeremy. Usual bunch of feckless thoughtless baby makers; those poor bloody kids of theirs what chance have they got? In 15 yrs, if the programmes still on air, it’ll be them on sitting on stage slagging each other off and, by then, they’ll already have birthed the next generation! Finished watching Tim then went to bed and tried to catch on back episodes of The Skeptics Guide to the Universe; unfortunately kept drifting off so only heard parts. Up at 5:30 showered and had dinner. Nat’s still enthusing about his new school then I went onto Youtube to show them both that I’d found a site that had a full recording of The Ascent of Man; it turned out that it had an awful lot more than that and we watched a few episodes of the Disney series Bill Nye – The Science Guy, a programme never broadcast in the UK so far as I know but very good. As usual it was difficult to keep Han’s attention focused. She’s got a good mind but seems reluctant to use it, what to do?

Anyway, off to work where Julie B, whose daughter got married at the weekend, had brought in two large cream cakes…yum! Bharat also gave me some of his potatoes curry which sits beside me as I type smelling delicious. Nuff said!

Thursday 3 Sept - Back To School

This is it folks, in a few short hours Nat starts big school and Han becomes a Junior at her school, where the hell has the time gone too?

I'm trying to remember what it was like to change schools and the memories there both sharp and vague which is weird. I can remember it clearly but not in any detail though I can remember my first year class distinctly. I went to Rhymney Secondary Modern

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(this was where they confined and consigned 11+ failures in the 1960's)

I don't know what it's used for now, they built a new school shortly before I left Wales in 1976, but the picture above was taken withing the last three years and the place still looks fairly institutional.

I Started at RSM in Sept 1967 and now 42yrs later my Son's about to go through the same experience. I hope he enjoys it more than I did. Don't worry Han, it'll be your turn before you know it; enjoy Millfield while you can, the hard work starts in BIG School!

Tuesday 2 Sept 2009 - Sleepless in She Battle, Soup and Times When I Wish Hell Existed! Bye Senator.

What to say today; what a poet and I didn't know it? If I had the time; I'd write the rest in rhyme, I have but a trice so prose must suffice.

Douglas Adams said that Vogon poetry was bad; he knew nothing!

Today was a nightmare sleep-wise. I arrived home at 7:45 with my head splitting, my knee burning and a desire for an alternative to Tramadol. I knew then that it was going to be very difficult, if not impossible, to get a good days sleep but I hadn't reckoned on the additional delight of having Han's friends (enemies) spending the entire day knocking on the front door. What is it with little girls; it seems as though they fall in and out of friendship, with each other, a hundred times a day?

Nat and Sion (Donna's daughter) left, at 11:00, to catch the bus to Endeby. They were on a mission to sus out the bus stops and chip shops near to their new school; term starts on Thursday. I was left with Han and an obsessive, desperate and all consuming desire to sleep.

Around 11:30 I left her playing on the PC, with firm instructions not to go out unless she came and told me, and climbed the stairs to Bedfordshire.

Too tied to read or even listen to podcasts I climbed wearily into bed and semi-consciously anticipated my journey to the land of Nod.

THAT'S WHEN IT STARTED.....

"knock, knock, knock, knock......knock, knock, knock, knock
"Han answer the bloody door it's your mates" I shout.
The door opens, doorstop conversations ensue,
"Daddy I'm going outside with Mantell...."
"OK make sure you've got your phone."
"OK"... Door SLAMS LOUDLY, once more I sought solace in the arms of Morpheus.

A LITTLE while later, Door SLAMS LOUDLY, Nat or Han are back......

"knock, knock, knock, knock......knock, knock, knock, knock
"Han answer the bloody door it's your mates" I shout.
The door opens, doorstop conversations,
"Daddy I'm going outside with Chan...."
"OK make sure you've got your phone"
"OK"... Door SLAMS LOUDLY....

and so goes the rest of the day.

Barlene's been horrible....
Door SLAMS LOUDLY............
"knock, knock, knock, knock......knock, knock, knock, knock
"NAT KILL YOUR SISTER'S BLOODY MATES"
The door opens, doorstop conversations,
"Daddy I'm going outside with (add appropriate name).

This pattern repeated itself over and over interrupted, only occasionally, by Nat experimenting with the TV. Eventually he did find the volume level necessary to wake the dead, a group he so nearly joined!

Eventually, I managed to sleep; with headphones plugged into my ears, said headphones plugged into my phone, said phone on maximium volume playing the podcasts I was too tired to listen too! I should have done that from the start; you live and learn or you don't live!

I had the strangest dream...



Finally some sleep, up for 6pm, dinner was smashing, Deb had made her own breaded turkey fillets which we ate with a salad (our onions and lettuce) and french beans (also from the allotment) cooked and left to go cold....these were delicious! I've taken the rest of yesterdays soup to work and approximately 5 minutes ago, it's now 01:50 2/9/9, I heated it in the microwave and now I'm about to drink it, God the excitement of my life....Cheers!

A girl found strangled in her mother's boyfriend's lorry may have been sexually assaulted, police have said. Stacey Lawrence, nine, was found in the cab of the lorry on the A605 near Warmington, in Northamptonshire, on Saturday afternoon. Darren Walker, 40, from West Bromwich, was found dead in woods nearby. Fry Forever You Evil Sick Piece of Shit!!! Maybe you couldn't live with what ever you'd done, but there was no need to kill the poor little thing as well you C**T. If there was a Hell (though of course there isn't) I would so hope that you were experiencing everything it had to offer!!!!!!

Talking of sad deaths Ted Kennedy passed away last week. The most under rated of the three Arthurian brothers but the one, who in the end, probably achieved the most. I've always been interested in US politics, first, because the Vietnam War played out in the back round of my childhood, secondly, because two of the most brilliant teachers I had at University were Yanks. One, James Manor, a specialist in the politics of India and SE Asia, was my personal tutor in my second year, the other (who's name, to my shame, I can't now recall) was a visiting scholar who taught the 1 st year US politics course, he introduced me to the theory that the US, rather than being a pluralist democracy, was in fact governed by a hierarchy of cross cutting elites, something akin to the UK "Old Boys Network" and third, I can remember the Kennedy assassination, I was 7, and the effect that it seemed to have on everyone at the time. Anyway, whatever the reasons, I've always followed US politics fairly closely and had been aware of TK's achievements in the Senate. It will be interesting to see what effect his death has on the current health care debate. If he'd lived he would, no doubt, have continued to have played a major role in it's outcome.