Thurs 6 May – Yawn… I was woken by the nurses, at 6:00 to have my vitals done (AGAIN) and to take more pain medication, I was on a cocktail of stuff including injected morphine, oral morphine and Tramadol tablets with a view to reducing down to Tramadol / Co-codeine by time of discharge. Normally on the morning after your Op they try and get you out of bed and into a chair so that you can start using the replacement ASAP. In my case it was decided not to do this; because of the pain medication problem after the Op my system was fluctuating wildly. My temperature kept rising and dipping +38 centigrade (+100 F), for much of the times my heart beat was tacicardic (Tachycardia is usually classed as a pulse over 100 beats per minute – the previous day my resting rate was 77 which I easily reduced too 66 using simple relaxation techniques) and my BP was through the roof 140/110. It was thought best to leave me in bed under observation for the rest of the day. There were three other men on the ward with me, a young Asian lad who’d damaged his knee playing soccer and old older guys (late 60’s and late 70’s) both of whom had just had knee surgery. That morning there was a bit of a flap when it appeared that the younger of the two (Mr. Snore – see below) had had a heart attack. Lots of activity for a while until it was discovered to be a false alarm. Somehow, I’d ended up with the TV remote control and flicked through the various Five Channels (yes only five) following the election. The two hourly check-ups continued and my vitals seesawed in both directions throughout the day although toward the evening they began to settle down.
Deb and the kids called in between 7-8 for a brief visit, visiting hours appear to have been cut back since the last time I was here, and provided some welcome if short lived company. Finally the POLLS closed and we settled down to watch Channel Four’s alternative election night. Jimmy Carr, David Webb and Charlie Brooker were as amusing as I’d anticipated but things were spoilt somewhat when we (I and the 70+ guy the young Asian bloke had been discharged late PM) discovered that our remaining roommate was “Mr. Snore - the Amazing Snoring man”!!! My God I’ve never heard ANYTHING LIKE THIS GUY!!!. He started dropping off around 9:00 and each time he did the noise was unbelievable. I never thought that there was anyone in the World who could make more noise than my late Dad (he suffered a severe nasal injury as a young man that made it virtually impossible for him to breath through his noise for the rest of his life) but you live and learn…or you don’t live; this guy could have got a job as a stand in for a fog horn. I split my time between trying to hear the TV and dreaming up ways to terminate the LOUD bastard!
The results started coming in and after numerous requests from the staff to turn the sound down I switched over to BBC1 and tuned my phone into Radio Four which was broadcasting the audio stream. So there I was, TV volume off, listening on headphones I settled down to follow the nights results of the most important election in years: almost immediately I fell asleep…Twat!
I wasn’t checked every couple of hours that night so only woke occasionally to piss in the cardboard wee wee bottle next to my bed. Once again I was woken at 6:00 and discovered that the 10:00 PM exit poll taken the night before had been virtually spot on and that we did in deed have a “Hung Parliament”. This, I thought, should to be interesting!
Friday 7 May – I should be going walkies today but first lets get the routine stuff out the way; vitals, heart rate still erratic, BP much better Temp dropped, things are looking better. Breakfast - Rice Krispies barely toasted toast, marmalade, fruit juice and coffee, same as yesterday. After this was over one of the nurses helped me out of bed and for the first time since the Op I got to sit in a chair, God it was so good to be able to bend my legs. I was given strict instructions to stay exactly where I was until physiotherapy had been to see me. The three of us watched the news and followed the election results; there was nothing else on anyway. Eventually Physiotherapy turned up and gave me a walking frame to try out; walked halfway to the Loo using this when it was suggested that perhaps I’d like to try using the crutches the rest of the way. Got to the Loo, did five handstands and three cartwheels on the way but I won’t mention those because it might make me appear big headed. For the first time since Tuesday night I had A SHIT…The Relief! Walked back to the ward and was congratulated by the physios on my progress and told that they’d see me again later. They returned two hours later when they MADE me walk out of the ward, it was miles and miles and miles I tells you…it’s true, honest, to the stairs and then, The Bastards, made me walk down stairs and then back up. As I lay on the ground greedily sucking from the oxygen mask they told me I was fit to go home and walked off and left me to my fate. Well actually they told me I’d done really well and got a chair and wheeled me back to bed. A little while later my surgeon Mr. Davidson visited and confirmed that the seemed to be no reason why I couldn’t go home tomorrow.
By now even I, a politics junkie of the first order, was getting tied of the election coverage, 24 hour news coverage really has a downside when there's nothing actually happening, and so I plugged in Han's net book and my external hard drive and decided to watch season four of Heroes. I had an ulterior motive, in addition to just wanting to watch the programmes, Mr. Snore kept falling asleep and…guess what? I watched these off and on until 3:00 AM and I’ve only got four episodes left to watch. Deb and the kids turned up at seven; nurse Han insisted on taking Dad to the Loo, she’s an angel when she’s not being a monster. After they left the earphones when back in and I once more immersed myself into the world of Heroes; I can see why people lose track of this series even back to back you sometimes lose track of what’s going on.
About 3:30 I climbed into bed plugged in my phone switched on an MP3 and finally drifted off to sleep.
Sat 8 May – I was woken at 6:00 dragged myself to the Loo for a poo and wash back to the ward to wait for the breakfast trolley. After breakfast Gillian, occupational health, called and walked back to the Loo to check that I was able to use all the special equipment at home and to see if I needed anything else. Once more watched the election coverage for a while before returning to watch more episodes of Heroes. Nothing much else happened, so far as I recall, Deb and the kids arrived at 4:30 and took me home. One more experience of the NHS one more reason to praise it to the skies*.
Sun 9 May – Took it easy most of the day, slept intermittently, watched election coverage (see separate entry re: election), ate dinner…you get the picture. Getting more mobile trying to see if I can use just one crutch on the way to the kitchen so that I’ll be able to carry things tomorrow when I’m home alone. The day passed uneventfully and once more to bed. Still getting temp fluctuations which means some morning the bedding is soaked when I wake because I’ve sweated so much overnight.
Sun 9 May – Took it easy most of the day, slept intermittently, watched election coverage (see separate entry re: election), ate dinner…you get the picture. Getting more mobile trying to see if I can use just one crutch on the way to the kitchen so that I’ll be able to carry things tomorrow when I’m home alone. The day passed uneventfully and once more to bed. Still getting temp fluctuations which means some morning the bedding is soaked when I wake because I’ve sweated so much overnight.
*If I was in the US
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